Two for the Price of One!

6 weeks

So, on November 21st Josh and I went back to STL to have our first ultrasound (u/s). We were both really excited because this would be the day they told us if one or both of our embryos "took". We had bought a video camera to capture our journey into parenthood and Josh brought it in with us to the exam room. Dr. A came in, all smiles, and said we were gonna get started...

With the lights of he began the exam and right away we were able to visualize a dark spot on the u/s which hadn't been there before. It was our baby! The doctor pointed out the different areas of the sac and showed us where the actual baby was in the picture we were looking at....Then.... he moved the "wand" just a little and suddenly there were TWO dark spots side by side...he said, "And there's baby 2".... We have TWINS!!!

It doesn't seem possible that this could happen for us. We've waited for so long and now all the wishing, hoping, praying, bargaining we'd done over the years has been answered!

And so it begins...

On November 5th 2008 our lives were changed forever...
I received a phone call from our clinic in St. Louis (Sher Institute) telling me that I am pregnant... I truly believe my heart stopped momentarily as I have been waiting to hear those words for 6 years.

Josh and I have been married for 8 years and had no luck on our own havng children. For 4 years we worked with an OBGYN and tried different things but to no avail!

In December of 2006 we had, what we thought at the time, was a blessing fall into our laps. A relative of Josh's best friend was having a baby and didn't want it. She had asked if we were still wanting kids and thought maybe we could be an option for her to give the child up for adoption. We jumped at the chance and welcomed a beautiful baby girl into our little family. I was the first to hold her, feed her, and change her. Josh and I stayed in the hospital that night and I got up with her for feedings. It was wonderful! The next morning Josh and I went to the nursery to meet with the pediatrician and give our new baby a name. About 30 minutes later, a nurse came in and told us someone was there to see us. In my naivete', I thought it was another family member there to congratulate us....It wasn't. There, in front of us, stood a tall man who said he was a social worker. He then sat us down and told us the most unbearable news we'd ever heard. "There's no easy way to say this. The young lady who's given birth to the child has opted out of the adoption." We were leveled, destroyed.... I'd never felt anything like that in my life. It was as if someone had died. Josh and I left that hospital that day numb and empty. After that whole thing I became very bitter and jaded and really didn't want to ever talk about or see babies again....

Then in the summer of 2008 my Dad came to us with another option...invitro fertilization. It's an expensive procedure and we were unable to try this on our own so the gift he gave us is immeasurable. We began our journey with IVF in June of 2008 and now, it's November and we've ended with a pregnancy!! After all that we endured with the failed adoption I never thought we'd see this day...have this experience. And I am soooo thankful! To my Daddy, to my family, to God...I will finally know what it is to be a mother and no one can take this baby away.

It's still very new and there's a part of me that's still cautiously optimistic because so much can happen in the first trimester to cause concern but I'm really trying to focus on the joy of being pregnant and all that comes with it. So far, I have REALLY sore bb's, I have to pee all the time, and I'm pretty tired through the day but I LOVE IT!!

I wanted to start this blog so our friends and family close and near could take this journey with us...
I'm looking forward to filling it with all our experiences!!!